


Push/Pull

by orphan_account



Category: Jossverse
Genre: Angst and Porn, Bodyswap, F/F, Feels, Hope for the future, The Slayer is part demon, This Year's Girl, dub con
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2013-03-07
Updated: 2013-03-07
Packaged: 2017-12-04 14:08:32
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 4,020
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/711590
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/orphan_account/pseuds/orphan_account
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Faith's about to leave town in Buffy's body when she sees a news report that changes her mind. But seeing the Slayer opens up a whole world of old issues.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Push/Pull

 

Faith didn’t get it. She should have loved being in B’s skin. The perky blonde look wasn’t really her style, but it had its uses. She wasn’t being chased by anyone for the first time in what felt like years, and she could have all the fun teasing Scoobies she’d ever dreamed of. So why wasn’t she into it? The former brunette sighed huffily as she tilted Buffy’s head in front of the mirror. _My head. It’s my head now. Maybe I could dye her hair. MY hair_. It was too confusing, and she wondered if there would ever be a point when she saw her reflection and thought ‘Faith’. It wasn’t a bad reflection though: the familiar Slayer muscle with a golden tan, modest curves, full pink lips. Faith had always been torn between wanting Buffy and wanting to be her, and now she got both. She dug around in Buffy’s wardrobe for something to show off her new ass but the short skirts she remembered had all disappeared.

“Lame, B. What happened to the skimpy stuff?”

She managed to find some shiny tight black pants that brought back memories of patrolling til midnight and then dancing til two. Faith felt a pang as she slid her hand over a leather-clad thigh, thinking of Buffy now. _Do the cops have her? The Watchers? Is she already on her way to England? Is she dead?_ But the last one seemed so impossible she shook her head. _Why do you even care?_ her reflection asked.

“I don’t.”

 

She made it all the way to the airport without running into one of the Slayerettes. The waiting around at Buffy’s house made her itch but she knew it was the best way to keep her cover. _After all, I was in a coma for months. I can deal with doing nothing for another few hours_. She sat in the uncomfortable plastic chair and listened for the boarding call. Faith glanced up at the TV, twirling her hair through her fingers. It was local news, nothing too exciting. _It’s Sunnydale after all – none of the juicy stuff makes it to the news_. The video changed to a shot of a reporter in front of a church and Faith started paying attention. _Vamps_. Her Slayer senses were already speeding up at the first hint of prey, but she clutched her boarding pass tighter.

_No. No, you’re almost out of here. Someone else will deal with them._

_Oh yeah? Who? You got the other Slayer locked up, genius._

_Giles and the gang can handle this._

But that annoying voice in her head refused to believe it. Faith struggled to control her feelings. She’d let people die all the time when she was working for the Mayor, even killed her share. Why should she worry about more deaths? But that whisper that sounded remarkably like her mother started again. If she walked away, if she did nothing, what did that make her? _Selfish_. _Slayers are supposed to kill vampires, end of story_. She couldn’t argue with that.

*****

 “Do we know what the situation is?” Buffy asked as they got out of Giles’ car.

“No clue. I could find an officer...” Giles trailed off, scanning the small crowd circling the church.

“I don’t want to go charging in half-cocked. I’m still not used to this body.” Buffy fidgeted.

Willow beamed at her. “It’ll be okay, Buffy. You just have to use the katra and you’ll be back to your old self in no time.”

“We hope.” Tara muttered.

“I don’t wanna waste any more time here than I have to. I just want to get in, dust everything and find Faith before she does something even more evil.”

Willow glanced at a nearby cop. “Okay, go. We’ll distract him.”

“Thanks Will.”

She waited until the others had crowded around the nearest policeman (Giles shouting about tiny, tiny babies) and ran straight to the church doors. Buffy was so angry at everything and everyone right now she wanted nothing more than to charge in and go on the rampage, but she forced herself to stop. _Whoa, hothead. You’re even starting to think like Faith_. She placed her ear against the wood and listened. People whimpering, material shifting as they moved. One of the vamps was talking; it sounded like he was near the other end of the building. Then she heard another voice and positively recoiled from the door. _Faith_. _What is she doing here? To hell with it._ Buffy kicked in the door, immediately staking the vamp guard standing by the entrance.

Faith looked surprised. “B? Thought you’d be halfway across the world by now.”

“I thought the same about you.”

The vamp nearest Faith, seemingly the leader, attacked. The Slayer grappled with him, blonde hair flying as she twisted and punched. The remaining vamp came at Buffy and she dodged, leading him away from the doors.

“Get out!” she yelled at the civilians, “Go now!”

 

They didn’t need to be told twice, hurrying out in droves like terrified mice. Buffy wanted to focus on her opponent but everything felt wrong: fighting with Faith’s arms and Faith’s legs while worrying the real thing was moments away from stabbing her in the back. She took a few hits to the face she could have easily avoided and shook herself, vaulting over the pews to get some breathing space. _Okay, come on Buff. You’ve done this a thousand times. You’ve even done it with Faith before. Just stake him and move on_. She spared a glance for her body, Faith and the main vamp smashing through the wooden rail by the altar. She seemed to be holding her own. Buffy squared off again the demon charging towards her, waiting until he was almost on top of her before she swung her knee up into his gut and threw him. He crashed into a bench and went down hard, and her stake plunged into his back.

“Ha! That’s more like it,” she turned to see how Faith was going, “Uh oh.”

The other Slayer was pinned against the steps, struggling to keep distance between her neck and the dull fangs stretching towards it. Buffy didn’t even hesitate, just ran as fast as she could and dove on the vamp stake-first. The demon turned to dust and her momentum carried Buffy down on top of Faith, winding the already out-of-breath girl and almost catching her with the sharp wood.

“Damn B, you trying to save your body or not?” Faith coughed.

Buffy just frowned at her, confused. She realised it wasn’t her body she’d wanted to protect, but Faith. _Doesn’t mean anything. I’m a Slayer – looking out for people is part of the job. Plus she_ is _in my body so it was probably an automatic self-preservation thing_.

“This little freakshow ends now. You’ve had your fun, I’m sure, but I’m taking back what’s mine.”

Her voice was cold, a strange sound in Faith’s husky tones. The brunette usually played things light and easy.

“Tell me, B. Tell me how weird it is seeing the body you know so well from the inside.” Faith smirked, blue eyes bright.

“Haven’t had time to think about it really, what with all the people trying to kill me.”

Faith’s lip curled up and Buffy wondered if she ever looked that sinister when she was herself. “Oh B, get over yourself. We both know you used to watch me when we patrolled. I could feel your eyes all over me.”

“Urgh! You are so deluded.” Buffy grimaced.

“Then how come you’re still on top of me now?”

Buffy looked down at their flesh pressed together. “Strategy. I’m keeping you down.”

“Say whatever you want girlfriend, but you’ve always wanted me.”

Buffy could feel herself blushing. “As if.”

“But it was so wrong before, right? ‘Oh no, Faith’s bad, I can’t be with her!’ Cept now I’m you, and you’re me. And that’s even better.”

“What are you talking about? I think that coma evaporated some of your brain cells.”

“It’s better,” Faith said, voice dropping so Buffy was forced to lean in further to hear, “Because I know exactly what that body needs. All the sweet spots. And same for you. We could have the world’s best sex.”

Buffy shuddered. “Yeah right! Like I’d ever let you touch me. Like I’d ever want _that_ with you.”

“But you do, B. You always have! I bet you’re wet right now just being this close to me.”

 

Buffy refused to think about that. If she didn’t think about it, there was no way it could turn out to be true.

“Doesn’t matter Faith. Cos in about five seconds you’ll be back in this impossibly skanky body and on your way to jail.” Buffy reached into her pocket for the katra.

Faith was faster. She suddenly heaved her hips and flipped Buffy over her head, scrambling to her feet. The box with the katra slid across the stone floor behind the altar. Buffy raced to get to her feet but Faith was there, dragging her up by her hair and slamming her against the pulpit.

“Give it a chance, B. We’ve been fighting almost since the day we met. Let’s try something else for once.”

Buffy raised her hands but Faith grabbed her wrists, pinning them back against the wood as her pelvis thrust forward to trap Buffy’s lower half. She was at a disadvantage – unlike Buffy, Faith’s body hadn’t been rigorously trained and tested for the better part of a year. Slayer healing was great and all, but she could use a little more muscle tone for this fight. Familiar fingers closed around her wrists, Faith’s other hand trailing over her cheek.

“I feel like you’re not being very open-minded here B.”

She actually laughed at that. “Shocker! I’m not very tolerant of rapey creeps.”

“Technically I’m not even touching you. Isn’t that weird?” Faith chuckled, tongue flicking out to lash Buffy’s lips.

A smart girl would have screamed, but Buffy was used to saving herself. Squeezed between the hard wood of the pulpit and Faith’s – her – Faith’s body, she had completely forgotten there were twenty people outside ready to run in and rescue her if only she cared to call. So she didn’t. She just pressed her lips together and fought back a gasp as Faith’s fingers stroked the side of her breast.

“Come on, girl. Loosen up a bit. I could take you places no one else can.”

“Wow Faith, I had no idea you were so desperate to get in my pants. How long have you been waiting for this? Or is it just vanity, you know, finally getting to screw yourself?”

Faith’s head snapped back and she growled. “Fine. We’ll do it my way then.”

She plastered her lips to Buffy’s neck, sucking hard. The smaller girl moaned and fought at the grip on her wrists but Faith’s other hand was resting on her hip and she couldn’t get any leverage. Those pouting lips moved up her jaw and then pulled back for a second as Faith regarded Buffy hungrily with her own eyes. She darted forward and crushed their mouths together, tongue pressing into Buffy’s mouth insistently. Buffy could feel it now, the desperation. Faith wanted something from her, anything, no matter how small – something she’d wanted since high school but Buffy had never been able to give. Faith drew back and just for a second, the gleeful look in her eyes wavered as Buffy fought for breath. Her mind raced. She’d wanted this once, but not now. Not like this. Not when everything between them was so wrong. But Faith needed it and Buffy’s resolve weakened in the face of the fingers that clutched at her hips not like an attacker, but like a child squeezing its mother’s hand in the dark. Slowly she relaxed her muscles and stopped fighting.

 

Faith seemed to notice the change but not understand it. She looked at Buffy curiously.

“B?”

“Kiss me.”

The uncertainty was still there, but Faith swooped in and did it, Buffy welcoming her in this time. The formerly blonde slayer thrust her chest against Faith’s, determined to never ever think about how weird this was as her own body rubbed against her. Gradually Faith’s grip on her wrists loosened and Buffy pulled away, resting a hand on the nape of Faith’s neck as the other wrapped around her cheek.

“We don’t have much time Faith. With the hostages out they might storm the place any minute.”

“It would never be enough time.”

Faith snaked a hand between them to undo Buffy’s tight leather pants. She kept up the hurried, firm kisses as Faith worked them slightly down her thighs and ran a finger over Buffy’s folds.

“Told you I made you wet.”

“No one likes a sore winner.”

The other slayer chuckled and danced her fingers over Buffy’s swollen bud. She cried out, knees shaking slightly. Every touch was like an electric shock.

“Feel that? All those months of pent-up sexual urges?” Faith taunted.

“Are you talking about the coma or last year?”

“Both. A good rattle takes the edge off, but all that time there’s only one person I’ve been burning for.”

Buffy didn’t answer, didn’t want to admit that no matter how much she wanted Faith this couldn’t happen. They were on opposite sides and she didn’t know if Faith could ever be brought back. A finger dipped into her passage and Buffy gasped, angling herself forward to let Faith in deeper. The other slayer’s body reacted so differently to hers, heat rushing to her chest as Faith’s thrusts sent sparks down her thighs. Something dark and ancient coiled inside her, something familiar that tasted like the rush of a good kill. It frightened Buffy and she tried to pull her mind away, but the feeling only grew as pressure started building in her core until it was killing her.

“Faith, please, please-”

“Can’t stop now B, you’ll explode.”

The nimble fingers circled her clit and pushed roughly and Buffy came, knocking her head back against the pulpit as raw energy surged through her. She was shouting without realising, riding an insurmountable high. _Is this how Faith feels all the time? Is this what it means to be in touch with the dark side of slaying?_ She slowly came back down to herself and immediately noticed the difference. She didn’t feel so restless anymore. Her body no longer seemed to be conspiring against her brain, no longer twitching and fidgeting ceaselessly. Buffy just hung limp against Faith and panted.

“Well B – how was the ride?”

 

Pounding footsteps saved her from answering. Buffy flung Faith away from her and ran behind the pulpit, fixing her pants as Giles burst in with Willow and Tara.

“Buffy?”

Faith glanced at her worriedly but Buffy couldn’t find words. Any and all language had deserted her.

“Buffy?”

“What have you done with her!” Giles demanded as they ran up the aisle.

Faith grimaced and ducked down, retrieving the katra before bolting over the altar and running out the back door. Buffy pulled herself together and rounded the pulpit as Giles and the others reached her.

“Buffy, are you alright? Should we go after her?”

“No, no. You’ll only get hurt.” She quickly shot that idea down.

“I had no idea Faith was inside,” Giles took off his glasses and rubbed his eyes, “Did you fight?”

“Yes.”

“Did she hurt you?”

“No.”

Willow clung to Buffy’s elbow anxiously. “Buffy, are you okay?”

She stared at the still swinging church door blankly. “I don’t know.”

*****

They took Buffy back to Giles’ rather than try to explain the situation to Joyce. Buffy was pretty sure they’d seen the last of Faith though. She was probably already out of town, and getting her body back was going to be a real bitch. Though as she sat on Giles’ couch and thought, she couldn’t help remembering the darkness that had stirred when Faith touched her. She’d never used that power in her fighting, but Faith hadn’t had a choice. Watching Kakistos kill her Watcher had driven the girl to a frightened, vulnerable place and she’d turned to that power to rebuild herself. Buffy wasn’t sure if she could ever forgive Faith for betraying them, but she certainly understood why now. No wild creature likes to be tamed.

“It’s okay Buffy, we’re gonna find Faith. She can’t just disappear.” Willow said as she opened her laptop.

“She hitchhiked her way from Boston to Sunnydale with an ancient master vamp on her tail. Faith can do anything.” Buffy muttered.

“It is a little harder since you must remain out of sight of the authorities, but I’m confident we can track her quite well from here.” Giles smiled.

“Giles, how much do you know about the first slayer?”

The Englishman frowned. “What? Why do you ask?”

“When I was with Faith at the church – you know, fighting...it felt different.”

“Well I would imagine it would. Faith’s body would not perform the same as yours.”

“No, it was something else. Like this force inside me that was almost...demonic. Something that just took over this body and made me hungry for the kill. It’s obviously a part of her, really a part Giles. It’s not just in her mind.”

“Are you suggesting Faith’s actions may be motivated by some sort of possessing influence?”

“Not entirely...I just wanted to know more. It has to be part of the Slayer package and if it’s going to happen to me I wanna know.”

Giles looked perturbed but nodded. “I’ll see what I can find out.”

 

Buffy wasn’t much help in the search for Faith. She couldn’t show her face outside Giles’ apartment and she couldn’t use the computer as fast as Willow. She made one or two suggestions and then started pacing, counting down the hours til dark when it would be safer for her to go out and look. When they’d gotten to Giles’ she’d been convinced Faith would just high-tail it out of there but now she wasn’t so sure. The hurt look Faith had shot her when they were interrupted wouldn’t stop popping into Buffy’s mind. She clapped her hands against her thighs impatiently.

“Guys, I’m gonna check the usual places. Willie’s, the Bronze, any place Faith might go to blow off some steam.”

“Buffy I’m not sure that’s a good idea. The police are looking for you.” Giles frowned.

“I’m not gonna do anything stupid. I’ll stick to the shadows and keep my distance. I just can’t sit here another minute and do nothing while Faith is wandering around out there as me!”

“Alright. Be careful. You have the katra?”

“Sure,” she lied, patting her pocket, “Thanks.”

Buffy strode out, slamming the door behind her.

*****

Faith wasn’t sure why she hung around. It was stupid, with B looking for her and probably madder than ever after the church. But she needed time to clear her head before she could decide on her next move. She was haunted by the soft moans, the shaking grip, the way Buffy had broken open under her touch – and wishing it had been Buffy’s real body, not her own. It didn’t seem like much of an achievement getting herself off, watching her own face. She wanted the real thing and that was never going to happen. She’d headed to the old apartment the Mayor arranged for her, more out of habit than any real idea. It was still empty, the window fixed and the furniture exactly as she’d left it. Someone had held onto it for her. _Probably the Mayor’s last order_. She flung herself down on the bed and refused to think about it, going back over and over the curve of Buffy’s lips in her mind.

 

She must have fallen asleep, though she would have thought it impossible, because when she opened her eyes it was dark. A noise in the hall made her sit up and a second later the door handle popped off and the door swung open.

“B.”

“I thought you might be here.”

“I didn’t.”

The other Slayer walked in, pushing the door shut behind her as she came to stand by the couch with her arms crossed.

“They fixed the window.”

“Guess Wilkins told them to keep things ready for me. You know, if I ever woke up.”

“Do you miss him?”

“I missed you more.”

They were quiet, still on opposite sides of the room. Buffy trailed the toe of her boot over the floor.

“Look B, I’m sorry about earlier. Hell, sorry about a lot of things but that was pretty low.”

Buffy’s head snapped up, their eyes locking. “I felt it. What you feel all the time. The thing that drives you.”

Faith took a shuddery breath. “It’s a riot, isn’t it?”

“It was terrifying. I felt like I was losing myself to some primal, awful thing. And then afterwards I’d never felt more alive.”

“Quite a kick.” Faith nodded in agreement.

“Is that why you did...all of it? You needed the release?”

“I’m not gonna make excuses for myself B. I made my own choices.”

“I made a choice today.”

“I wish you could take it back, honestly I do.” Faith closed her eyes.

“What if I don’t want to?” Buffy inched closer.

“Don’t, B. This isn’t going to happen. We had our chance and I blew it.”

“Faith, I know things are complicated. Too messy to ever be put right. There are things that still hurt when I lie awake at night. But we can redo today. We can salvage that at least.”

 

She came to the edge of the bed and uncrossed her arms. Faith hissed as Buffy ran her fingertips through the blonde strands hanging by her face.

“No. Not like this. I-I-can’t-”

“It’s okay, Faith.”

“It’s not.”

She reached into her top and pulled out the tiny box that held the katra. She slipped it over her hand and offered it to Buffy. The Slayer hesitated for half a second before laying her palm against the small glowing device.

There was light and a bang, and with a horrible nauseating wrench Buffy felt herself ripped out of Faith’s body and into her own. It was less uncomfortable than the first change though, and she figured it was because she belonged here. The force knocked her body backwards onto the bed and Buffy pulled herself up onto her elbows.

“Faith?”

The other girl was curled up on the floor, breathing heavily. She looked like she’d been winded. Buffy crawled down and sat beside her, using one hand to turn Faith’s chin up.

“You okay?”

“Little bruised.”

“Yeah.”

Buffy leaned down and kissed her, lips soft and pliant. Faith laid her hand on Buffy’s chest and pushed gently.

“Buffy...”

“I want this, Faith.”

She stood and sat on the edge of the bed again, offering Faith her hand. The brunette looked at it sadly, her eyes pleading as she searched Buffy’s face. She must have seen something there, because she took it and let Buffy pull her up onto the bed, arms wrapping around each other like lost girls.

*****

Buffy woke to a faint breeze on her cheek and an empty bed. She glanced around the apartment but there was no one else there. She touched her face, reassured she was still herself – though a self covered in love bites and bruises, with aching buttery muscles. Something white on the bedside table caught her eye and she picked it up hesitantly.

_B. What can I say? Tonight was...everything. I’m gonna think about it every day for the rest of my life. But I can’t stay. You can’t calm me down, B. It’s too late. I can’t be still. I can’t be as good as you want me to be._

_I wish I could. More than anything._

_Love ya always_

_Fxx_

Buffy put it down with a sigh. “Don’t worry, Faith. We’ll figure out how to lull the monster to sleep again.”


End file.
